What would you do if you weren't afraid?

 

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Two good things came out of  being bedridden with the flu for two weeks over the Christmas season - I had a lot of time to read and think. Secondly, I lost a ton of weight (which I regained soon after. The joy of having a flatter tummy and skinnier thighs was undeniably fabulous while it lasted. Pffffftttt). If I could turn back the clock, there was one thing I'd do differently - be more fearless. It was fear that held me back from taking more risks, being myself or taking the opportunities when they presented themselves.

Over the course of the next 5 months, I spoke to friends, acquaintances, strangers, kids etc. The one thing that stuck out like a bright neon signboard was how fearful most people are. The fear of being ridiculed. The fear of appearing stupid. The fear of being laughed at. The fear of failure. The fear of being unable to handle success. The fear of rejection. Here's the thing - 99.5% of our fears lie in the realms of our imagination. It's crazy to think that the power of imagination is so potent that it can paralyze us and impale our dreams permanently. What's even crazier is that most of our fears never even materialize yet they can stop us dead in our tracks. In fact, most of us are so absorbed in their own worries and everyday trivialities, they don't have time to think about other people.

But hey, what if we did look stupid? So what's the big deal? The Armageddon did not descend on planet Earth and decimate the entire population. Why do we take ourselves so seriously? You'll notice that if you laugh at yourself, others laugh with you, not at you. There's also an audible sigh of relief from those around you because they can relate to you.

While we're on the topic of imagination. Imagine if Rosa Parks did not defiantly refused to give up her bus seat in 1955 in the days where the blacks and whites were segregated. There wouldn't be a launch of civil rights movement soon after with the removal of legal color bars. Bit by bit, many in Malaysia have taken a step to speak out against the corrupt government despite the threat of imprisonment and other bullying tactics by the officials.

If you're a parent, what kind of impact will you have on your kids if they see you feel the fear yet do it anyway? What would be the butterfly effect if you'd stepped out of your comfort zone and did what you've always wanted to do?

Is imitation the highest form of flattery?

Next Pale Blue Cuff

Hermes Kelly Dog

You know what they say? Imitation is the highest form of flattery. Though I'm not particularly sure if I agree completely with that statement.

Fifteen years ago, I purchased a "Birkin inspired" bag in Hong Kong for $150. I used it once and discarded the bag months later. The hubby once stopped me from buying a lookalike Van Cleef & Arpels Alhambra necklace with these words - you'll never be satisfied with a second rate item. I guess it's like craving for a chocolate fudge cake but getting a carob cake instead.

However, I've noticed that High St stores are now copying designs right off the runway, some more blatantly than others. British designer, Jonathan Saunders was once asked about this issue. He broached the topic with a lot of grace and tact though I can empathize how difficult it must be to see one's hard work copied without any financial compensation.

Check out the poor relation of the original Hermes Kelly Dog from Next. It looks like a counterfeit Hermes bracelet with wonky hardware and badly applied paint along the edges.

15 minute Meals for Spring

A combo of whole wheat and normal spaghetti tossed with toasted pine nuts, fresh & crisp cherry tomatoes (marinated in extra virgin olive oil, chopped basil, sea salt), pan fried courgette and streaky bacon (or pancetta).


Steamed & lightly mashed potatoes tossed in butter and a sprinkling of sea salt. 
Salmon baked/grilled for 10-12 minutes with slivers of butter, sea salt, freshly ground pepper and a squeeze of honey on top. 
Salad: cubed cucumber, cherry tomatoes, basil, beetroot and honey infused goat cheese with vinaigrette (extra virgin oil, squeeze of lemon, a teaspoon of dijon mustard and teaspoon or two of honey)

Omelette with salad (salad leaves, cherry tomatoes, ham and goat cheese)

There are 3 things I just cannot get used to despite having lived in the U.K for 5 years now.

One - Accents. There are more accents in England than the number of freckles on my face (and I have a LOT!). Drive 20 miles out of one town and into the next and you'll get someone speaking a different kind of English. I get into a lot of trouble whenever I speak to someone at a call center. I'm sure they want to bash my head in when I say "I'm soooo sorry....could you repeat that again? Pretty please?" for the millionth time.

Two - Bureaucracy. How many British government officials does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: 5. One to apply for the permit to change the light bulb. One to process the application. One to approve the application. One to buy the light bulb. One to change the light bulb.

Three - the weather. It's even more hormonal than I am and has thrown more hissy fits than some of the naughtiest kids I know. It's officially spring and I steadfastly refuse to wear anymore winter clothes despite freezing my arse off. This is also the very reason why I've also adopted a spring menu recently. Well, that and also I needed to shift some unsightly bulges from overindulgence. Here are 3 simple ideas, not so much as recipes that you can put together in under 15 minutes. Bon Appétit!

Weekend Snapshots

Creperie by South Kensington tube station

Manolo Blahnik's tiny flagship store on Old Church St, Chelsea

A beautiful terraced house that will require more kidneys than I can afford to give up

Last Saturday, I hitched a ride with a friend to London and spent a few quiet hours strolling the streets, food gazing, talking to strangers (the result of working from home and never having an opportunity to verbalize one's thought), reading a book at a cafe, people (and shoe) watching, admiring charming townhouses and calculating how much a kidney is worth these days. 

I pinch myself every now and then, to remind myself how lucky I am to live so close to London. Far enough to appreciate the countryside and not feel overwhelmed by the fast paced city but close enough to pop over whenever I get the urge to.

After being nearly driven mad by a child who kept haranguing me to bake the Pandan Chiffon cake, I decided to give it a go. It's a fairly common cake in Malaysia with its airy, sponge-like texture along with the aromatic pandan (screwpine leaves) and coconut flavor. My sister bought the cake tin and paste for me a few years ago and I finally got around to using them for the very first time yesterday. It's actually fairly easy to bake so if you're keen to give it a go, here's the recipe.



Well, since the oven was still pretty hot, I decided to bake a Victoria Sponge as well. We had to forego dinner after a cake gorging session. After much googling, I found out that you could make your own self raising flour by simple adding 2 teaspoons of baking powder per every 150g of plain flour. Pretty neat, huh?

Pass It Forward: 3 Unconventional Bloggers

These 3 aren't your conventional bloggers. They don't do popular, mainstream or your typical run of the mill type of fashion blogging. They're so different that they're actually cool. They send a clear message about their individuality and make no excuses about it. That's also the very reason why I love reading their blogs. These 3 ladies are also rather camera shy so don't expect to see their faces plastered all over their blogs.

Jess of Empty Emptor

Jess is a post-doctoral cognitive neuroscientist from the U.K. Her writing is riveting, thought provoking, insightful and not without plenty of research material to back up her arguments. In fact, she reminds me of Dana Thomas, the brilliant author of How Luxury Lost Its Lustre who doggedly pursued every avenue to uncover the reality behind luxury brands. Jess explores various topics ranging from consumption driven by blogs to the two sides of so called ethical practices within the fashion industry. I'm slowly going through her entire archive which I believe should be compiled into a book.


   
Amanda of Assembled Haphazardly

Though I hate all insects, I do have a brain the size of one so I flit from topic to topic, thanks to an extremely short attention span. That's also the reason why Amanda's blog appeals to me as it's more of a journal of her thoughts on food, fashion and life. It feels personal, more of a one on one conversation with a close friend. I love that she doesn't follow trends but marches to the beat of her  drum in her own gentle manner.



Aliya of Aesthetic Li

You may recognize Aliya from her popular blog, Marant Philes dedicated to all things Isabel Marant. However, Aesthetic Li has a wider scope and covers street style along with her own outfits. It can be a little demoralizing when you see picture perfect photos of perfectly made up, super thin and tall who often ended up modeling for brands. Kudos to them. However, the majority of ladies on Planet Earth are a little, how do you say, shorter, have problem areas and dress to suit their lifestyle as well as made up of all different skin colors. The North Caroline based speech therapist includes a wide variety of street style fashion that's not only chic but also relatable.

Fashion Holy Grail

By the way, these books make fabulous displays and fool guests into thinking that I'm an intellect. My REAL reading material lies in another bookcase.  

I used to think that if I've found THE ONE (no, I'm not talking about the human type or else I would be a serial bigamist by now), that would be it. The yearning, the hunt, the stalking, the obsession.... that will all cease. It's no different to a hunter stalking its prey. (Come to think of it, it almost sounds like disturbing behavior from a troubled individual. And we're talking about something as benign as a Fashion Holy Grail). I can finally enjoy my long awaited HG. But then......the strangest thing happens. Along comes yet another Fashion Holy Grail. And another. And another.

When will it ever end?  I suppose cancelling subscriptions to all the magazines and online publications may help reduce the never ending desire for the next Holy Grail by a smidgeon. Or the other extreme, smash the router (must remember to call it a roooooter here in the UK) on the concrete floor a number of time to ensure that it's totally dead. No internet. No connection to the outside world. The other option is to become a recluse and live in a cave.


Etoile Isabel Marant parka (similar here) and Rick Owens jacket (heavily discounted) (similar here)



I guess it's no different to any other holy grails. A bigger house. The latest MacBook Air that's so light it can float. A boxful of Diptyque candles.  I can go on but let's get back to the ones related to fashion. You spend all day long working, looking after every member of your family, sit through mind numbing and endless children activities, managing your finances, planning for your future and let's not forget, the endless housework. You want something to take your mind off the heavy load that's perched on your shoulders. You want something that's fun, mindless and yes, superficial. Furthermore, it makes you feel darn good. Well, until the next hunting season begins.




Take the Hermes Kelly which I've driveled on often enough here. I decided that the style was more me compared to a Birkin but living in New Zealand has its disadvantages. I was hundreds of miles away from the nearest Hermes store and I didn't want to wait another 3 years. I've decided on the color, leather and size but finding one was near impossible until I saw it sitting in its glory at a consignment store. I was hyperventilating and literally broke out in cold sweat when I had to hand over my bank card. Or the boyfriend jeans which took me 6 months to find. Thanks to Sam, I've managed to my holy grail jeans in Zara for a mere £29.99.

How about the Repetto leopard print ballet flats that I stumbled upon by chance at a third of the retail price while online window shopping at Yoox? I was so desperate to own a pair that I'd tried to convince the ladies at Repetto to have them custom made. They said no. I was devastated.


       
I'd been searching for a parka for what felt like a million years when my friend, Heather dug the Etoile Isabel Marant parka out of the hundreds of racks at the outlet store in Istanbul. I paid the act of kindness forward by doing the same for another friend at a Isabel Marant sample sale. She'd been lusting after my parka for the longest time. Ditto for the Rick Owens jacket so I won't bore you further with my endless tales of finding my FHG.

My rationale is that I've spent so long ticking these FHGs off my list that I had to put them to good use. And I did and still do. So, what's next? You didn't think my list is finite, did you? I'm still dreaming of finding the perfect panama hat and a neon yellow pumps that I can walk in. Oh and another Hermes Kelly if I happen to win Lotto.
             
Now it's your turn. What are YOUR Fashion Holy Grails?

Cool, Chic & Comfortable Summer Sandals £60 and under

Personally, the BEST thing about blogging is not about the events that I've been invited to or the number of hits I get per day but it's the friends that I've made. They keep me going on days when blogging becomes a chore (let's face it, few of us make enough to justify blogging professionally), inspire me when my "deep" well of ideas run as dry as the Sahara, celebrate my success or secretly nominate me for an award (yes, I'm talking to you, Avril. You know that I know that you did it). I want to thank Vanisha for the touching post she wrote about me over the weekend which made me teary eyed along with Sooae (of the Haute Cookie or should I say Hot Mama) who'd left such a sweet comment.

Clarks Sharna Balcony (enter "bright" for a discount)

I've now decided that the best way to go shoe shopping is to covertly stare at women's feet. No, seriously! Women shoe shop a lot. Since they've practically edited the entire world's shoe collection on your behalf, why go to all that trouble yourself? I go to a function and I check out the attendees' shoes. I shoe watch when I'm at a cafe. I don't have a foot fetish, just a tad obsessed with sandals after having boots permanently soldered onto my feet for more than half a year. I mean....it's not like staring at someone's groin or boobs. That would be totally wrong. And disturbing.

I was talking to a chic PR lady at a fashion event when I zoomed in on her shoes. Ankle strap? Check (can you tell I'm still addicted to ankle strap heels? My excuse is I'm channeling Sofia Coppola. So there). Chunky heels? Check!
"Err....." I interrupted her mid-speech. "Where did you get your shoes? Marni? Chloe?"
"Clarks", she whispered in my ear. "But don't tell anyone!" Poor lady looked remarkably uncomfortable. After all, we're surrounded by designer clad women.
Cue jaw dropping moment. Clarks?! That orthopedic....chunky....old ladies shoe shop on High St that I avoid like the plague?? NO! "You're kidding, right?!"
"Erm.....no."

Clarks Sleepy Dust (or here)

So I came home and checked out...... C L A R K S (sorry, I still have trouble saying that word). Insanely cheap and comfortable shoes. They're not going to win the designer of the year award and the quality is a little inconsistent but hey, for 30 something quid, I think I can put my misconceptions away for the moment. I spied a pair of gladiator heels that look Givenchy -esque. Another has the flavor of Roberto del Carlo wedges. While you're at it, do check these gorgeous flats from Boden. I spied them on a friend's feet at a party and I just HAD to find out.